To: Netflix

From: thebestboyfriendever@gmail.com
To: me@gmail.com
Date: Feb 13, 2006 2:42 PM
Subject: Something to blog about

http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/02/10/netflix.renters.ap/index.html


Thanks,
Ben

______________________________________________

From: me@CTU.com
To: whatthehellareyouthinkingdept@netflix.com
Date: Feb 13, 2006 3:15 PM
Subject: WWJBD

Dear Sirs,

I recently became aware of your policy to “throttle” DVD’s to those customers that you think are renting too many “unlimited video’s” per month. I implore you to flag my account as one of those in which throttling will not occure.

You see, my boyfriend and I have been watching and returning one 24 DVD per night. Which means, by mid March we will have watched four entire seasons of 24 which totals 48 DVD’s. It’s very important that we continue to receive these DVD’s in a timely fashion. The saftey of thousands of people are dependent upon this.

Since I have now watched over 15 hours of 24 in the last two weeks, I think it’s only fair to warn you that I have become very adept in the ways of counter terrorism. My hostile interrogation skills are now first rate. (SEE: I will totally cut out your eye if I don’t get the answers I want.) I have become an expert marksman. I can smuggle a gun, silencer, 2 clips, 2 pounds of C4 and a remote detonator into Secret Service secured convention… all in my left bra cup.

All that being said, I would hate to find out that my “training” is being thwarted by you. Think of the innocent men, women and children you would be endangering if I do not continue to receive my DVD’s as scheduled.


Best Regards,
Agent Antigone

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