Somebody stole my butter. MY BUTTER in MY tupperware container. There is a entire TUB of community use butter in the frige and somebody rummaged around enough to find MY LOW FAT BUTTER (in a plastic bag TIED AT THE TOP with the rest of my food in it) and used all of it but a sliver enough to cover ONE corner of ONE on my pieces of toast this morning.

You don’t go and UNTIE somebody elses bag to look through it.

I will find out who did it. My cube is next to the brake room. I can hear the toaster pop.

Revenge will be had. What can you put in butter that won’t make it look different that will tast like ASS? I was thinking ExLax at first but I don’t think the dose would be enough to do major damage if they are just toasting bread… so I’m gonna go with the make-it-taste-like-four-day-old-rotting-meat kind of revenge.

Suggestions?