Five things I’ve learned since my last blog post. Bulleted.

  • When you get to the grocery store and there is not a single cart outside, run. As fast as you can. Away from the store. That is a sign that every cart is in use IN the store and venturing in will lead to cussing and general feelings of discontent.
  • Never assume that handing in a paper is the end of an assignment. In 4th grade, it only means that you’ve STARTED and two weeks from that point there will be a “project” to turn in that your nine year old will suddenly remember to tell you about 48 hours before it’s due.
  • When you go to hack illegally upgrade your iPhone, it’s not best to start that 74,526 step process at 11:30PM. Because to get from 1.0.2 to a jailbroken 1.1.2 you have to upgrade to 1.1.2, then downgrade to 1.1.1 then jailbreak, then hack, then upgrade to 1.1.2 again, then jailbreak… again. And at 11:30PM you have the patience and clarity of thinking of a gnat.
  • Don’t ever trust that America’s Tire has a mother fucking clue about anything related to tires. Or to understand how studs work. Or that they should probably check to see if wheels are STAGGERED before they put them back on your car. Because they won’t. And they’ll screw up your studs, put the front wheels on the back and the back wheels on the front somehow try and blame YOU because you have boobies instead of balls and “you’ll be out of her in 35 minutes” will turn into the most frustrating 4 hours OF YOUR LIFE.
  • Cats will, without fail, wait till you have mopped all 2000 square feet of house before going outside, ingesting large amounts of grass and then throwing it up in various spots around said house. Cute little green packages of warm love… for me to step in.

Thanksgiving is tomorrow! We have company coming and I’m cooking enough food to feed 70 people. So if you are in the Bay Area and have nowhere to go, come on by, pull up a chair, enjoy the gluttony, and be thankful for stuff! If not, have a great Thanksgiving wherever you may be headed. 🙂

8 thoughts on “Five things I’ve learned since my last blog post. Bulleted.

  1. It sounds like you have had an interesting couple of days. And on a related note to cats: I also love how they wait until you’ve *just* cleaned the litter box before going in and letting loose!

    Anyway, how was your Thanksgiving?

  2. Our female cat does that. The male refuses to go in the litter box AT ALL and will only go outside. Which is great because I don’t have to clean up after him but really annoying when he has to go at 2:00AM… The only way he’ll go in the box is if we are gone but even then he usually tries to hold it till we get home and will RUN FULL SPEED out the door as soon as we open it.

  3. I’m amazed that your nine-year-old gives you that much notice. My little sister loves to ask for help the night before her project is due… usually as I’m trying to crawl into bed. Yay.

  4. Cassie & Whitney:

    I seriously wanted to take some people out with the shopping carts. And I might have actually done that… on accident of course! 😉

    Amy:

    If that happened the GOOD thing is that I probably have enough craft supplies in the craft closet to complete the project. The BAD thing would be Cassidy complaining constantly about being grounded FOR LIFE. :mrgreen:

  5. You can appreciate this. About a month ago our cat Zoe came walking into the living room and hopped up on Jessica’s lap. Jessica did not notice that she had a still live mouse in her mouth until Zoe put it in her lap. As soon as Speedy Gonzales hit her lap he took off running and tried to find safety in the crack in the back of the couch. This would be the point that my 7 month pregnant wife levitated over the coffee table and screamed a note that made all the dogs in a 10 mile radius want to mate with her. We ended up finding the mouse and after a week Jessica forgave Zoe. Hope that made you smile.

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