Why is it that I find MySpace so annoying and I never post there? I’ll give you the short list:

• StupidSlowâ„¢ load times.
• Page after page of aliased flashing gifs that cause me to have seizures.
• BRIGHT YELLOW text on a LIME GREEN background that cause my eyes to bleed in pain and force me to CTRL + A just to read.
• Band Spam. If I like your music I STILL won’t add you. Just. Stop.
• StupidMenâ„¢. No, I won’t add you. No I won’t message you back. No, I won’t tell you my shoe size (WTF?!). I only add people I know in real life or that I’ve met through various message boards/blogs and like. And I don’t like many people so there’s a 98.354% chance I won’t like you either.
• Fucking embedded music players. The last thing I want while browsing the web is your crappy music blaring in the background and waking the dead man in the shed out back. It’s intrusive and ghey and insulting that you even think I’d like that music anyway. Whatever it is.
• Fucking embedded video’s. See above. Every time I visit my little brothers profile I’m assaulted by the sound of some idiot kid having a violent encounter with his keyboard. I’d like to have a violent encounter with the punk that posted it in his comments.
• MySpaceHoochiesâ„¢. They are all over the place. They’ve infected it like a nasty virus. You can’t stand to see them but you still stop and stare. Like looking at road kill. Only road kill is not as Photoshopped and a little more appealing.

It’s sad really. They basically opened a flood gate of stupidity and every moron on the planet with a digital camera and an internet connection now has a way to pollute the web. One of the girls at work was showing another her MySpace yesterday. This is the same girl I overheard asking another how to add “more pixels to her camera” and “what’s the difference between a regular pixel and a mega one”. *shudder*

It’s not that I think all these people shouldn’t be allowed on the internet. (I might actually think that a little but for the sake of my point, believe it okay?) Or that every person on MySpace is guilty of one of the above offences. I guess it’s just my way of not welcoming change. Once upon a time, having a personal spot on the web was kind of a badge of honor us geeks wore proudly. Now, with the invention of idiot proof pre designed community sites it’s just become a new fad. Like those horrid leggings all the girls are wearing now. Or blue eye shadow.

12 year olds posting crotch shots complete with ‘My Humps’ as background music and their names in pink and purple “sparkling” image next to a glowing Playboy Bunny seems to cheapen all the hard work and dedication that goes into what you get at a personal domain. What you see here at aflux or over at Amabilis. Places where the emphasis is on creative individualism and eye candy and on leaving your personal mark on something.

Or maybe I’m just freaking the fuck out because a neighbor boy left a love letter in the mailbox for Cassidy in which he calls her is girlfriend.

Who knows…

There’s a new layout. In case you hadn’t noticed. I really really really love the way it’s turned out. I downloaded a free theme from nifty.nu then spent two days tearing it apart and building it back up. I can never leave good enough alone. I need to update the site section. And still need to get around to doing anything to the about section. But it’s pretty to look at. The graphic will change too. Eventually. It’s too plain right now. But it needs to be simple and everytime I try and create something it turns out LOUD(!!). And that’s the opposite of what I want right now.

Our sunflower and poppy plants have sprouted. Cassidy is beyond excited and if the care she has been giving these little sprouts is any indication of the future parent she might be, she will raise spoiled rotten and completely smothered children. But they will be well fed and watered. Daily. At 3:00PM.

Cassidy and I have been butting heads lately. It seems like when she turned 7 somebody pulled her aside and told her that lying to me was far better than getting in trouble for doing something she knows she shouldn’t have. It came to a head yesterday when, for the first time, she told me a calculated lie. Like, she intentionally thought it through and planned it and carried it out expecting me to fall for it…

When it happened I was so caught off guard and frustrated I told her she needed to sit on her bed and wait for me to calm down before we talked about it. We’ve grounded her in the past for lying. We take away Animal Crossing for a week, or limit her computer time to only educational software, etc. But this approach is not working and both Ben and I felt it was time to stop this FOR GOOD. And in order to do that we need to do something harsh and that will leave a lasting impression.

So. Today after school she came home, did her homework and spent the rest of the day in the guest room (where there are no toys) and was only allowed to read. Just sit in the room and read. This will continue till Sunday evening…

And it’s killing me. To know she’s up there in the room all by herself and I can’t hear her giggle echoing throughout the house, or her feet stomping across the hardwood floors, or her rummaging through her snack drawer trying to squash her near constant hunger lately. And we can’t play with her hair, and no knock-knock jokes, and no sneaking in her room to watch her made up dance routine to some current pop song.

I have to keep telling myself that this is for her own good. It’s because she NEEDS to learn this lesson. She CAN’T continue to think it’s okay to tell me little white lies to keep from facing consequences. And I need to start being better about positive reinforcement. When she DOES tell the truth, even though she will still get in trouble, I need to remind her that it’s not as bad as it would have been if she had lied. And I need to compliment her for telling me the truth and being “grown up” enough to do it.

*sigh* I miss the days of her little “oh oh’s” that were so easy to fix and clean up. This growing up stage is hard. And trying. I love how independent she is. And how she has her own taste in music (as bad as it may be), and her own off the wall style sense, and a growing sense of humor… but I’m not ready for her to be this old. She’s moving past the age of innocence. And I’m just not ready for that yet.

This post is going to be all over and around the corner and up the hill and back again. Stick with me.

*puts the post in gear*

I’ve started to add the finishing touches to the layout. The site section is up and running. I’m adding content slowly and as it’s completed. I feel good about how organized and pretty all the site info looks. Well, now that I look…. there should be bullets in front of the “Software” list. Dammit. Ah well, work in progress!!

I also have started the color change (links, title, etc.) Menu looks different. Still working. Might be finished tomorrow (yeah right), or next week, or next month (which also happens to be…. NEXT WEEK. HA!). The good thing is that I’m coming up on the one month mark and I’m still head over heals in love with kiwi. If it could snuggle with me at night to keep me warm Ben might find himself out of a job.

Kidding!!!

*shifts into second*

The New Girl became and American citizen yesterday. I decorated her desk with red, white and blue streamers and starts and balloons. It was cute and she was really surprised. I’m so happy for her. She really is my favorite co-worker. What’s amazing to me is that I can talk to her about current events. All the American born people there are clueless about politics. I’d bet over half of them didn’t even vote in the last presidential election. *shakes head* AND! She makes lumpia. So she wins COOLEST CO-WORKER EVER by default.

*shifts into third*

I’ve lost an additional two pounds. That’s 8 total so far. I feel better and better every day. I think I’m going on a week+ with no ‘Attack of the Killer Stomach’.

People are commenting now. Like, seeing the difference. It might be that since I’ve started shedding the pounds I’ve become somewhat obsessive about skincare again. Working out will really play hell on your complexion! I have some Mary Kay Day and Night solution on the way. That stuff is fucking fantastic.

*slams it into fourth*

Tonight Cassidy made this face and I had to capture it. This is the face she makes instead of saying ‘You adults are out of your minds.’ She’s starting to master the art of saying such things with body language.

I need to start taking more pictures again. I was obsessed for awhile but I kinda got sidetracked. I’m ready to start the obsession again. One part of it, I’m sure, was that I tend to… take pictures of myself (shut up, Ben) and I was just not happy with what I was seeing. I’m feeing better and better about that now.

*finds fifth*

Ben’s recovery is going quite well. He’s getting around sans crutches and the flexibility is getting better and better every day. He has aches and pains here and there but that’s to be expected when you don’t really use your leg at all for a week straight.

He was able to get into the M3 tonight. So for him at least, all is right with the world.

*engages cruise control*

I don’t usually do this because I find “plugging” people and site’s kinda… trendy-ish but what the hell, right? I can jump on the bandwagon for one post.

If you haven’t already, go check out becca. I’ve become a daily stalker of hers. Sooner or later I’m gonna have to start commenting. Well, commenting more. I’ve gone off track…

She makes me literally laugh out loud and it’s refreshing to see another young mother who’s so real, and a geek, and who takes lots of pictures, and plays video games, and is such a fantastic writer, and has a secret shrine set up to worship her skinny jeans. Okay, maybe that last part isn’t true but since we have so many other things in common I figured I’d throw that in there to make myself feel more non-lunatic-ish. Plus, she has some of the cutest little rugrats ever!!

Ben has had a torn medial meniscus of his left knee. Today he had arthroscopic surgery to repair it. It’s not clear yet if they cut away the torn part or were able to repair it. We’ll find out at his follow up appointment Monday. He said we get to see pictures of it. Fascinating. For the next three days he’s restricted to couch rest. Not bed because he can’t make it up the stairs. I feel bad for him. Stuck on the couch with the Sidekick, laptop, XBox, GameCube and three TV/DVD/audio receiver remotes all within reach on the coffee table… and two girls that love him enough to answer to his beck and call.

In other news, I’m rethinking telling Cassidy she can dress herself and do her own hair in the morning. Also, I was playing with the camera settings the other day and I need to figure out why it will only take blurry shots.