I just got a flu shot. And I don’t have TB. I guess this is one of the “perks” of working at a Major Medical University. Yearly TB tests and flu shots even though I don’t ever see patients.

I’m not sure how smart it was of me to get the flu shot since I’ve been on a steady supply of headache killing medicine for four days and I can hardly breathe out of my nose. *shakes fist at germs*

Oh well, assume if I don’t post in the next four days or so that it was a really bad idea. heh

Oh there’s so much to talk about and I really wish I had the energy or the time or the desire. I’m not sure this is the place. People read aflux. More people than let on… If I went into everything here it would only escalate and revive what I let go of today.

I had to send an email today to somebody I thought I could trust with my life and let him know that not only is that trust broken, but it’s damaged to the point that I really have no desire to ever even try to fix it. Maybe some day. Maybe not. Probably not. I’m not a forgive and forget kinda person. I’m a forgive and never let myself get to the point I can feel so betrayed again kinda person. Safe.

Along with the email I sent the aggression, the stress, the worry, the bad energy… Like an emotional attachment (pun intended). It’s yours now to do with as you may. You own it. It’s not mine anymore.

I’ve been physically ill since Sunday evening. I think it’s 75% virus and 25% poison from this drama. Hopefully now I can start to recover both mentally and physically.

I’m NOT GETTING SICK. I’m cuddling with Ben and temporarily forgetting that anything else in the world matters.

Why do I obsessively clean whenever Ben’s parents come to town? I clean for maybe an hour when my dad and Cherie come to visit. Maybe. But I spent the last 4.5 hours scrubbing, dusting, mopping, laundry, windows, ordering Cassidy around (but she loves to help out and begs me for tasks), organizing. It’s ridiculous, really.

I guess it’s because my dad has to love me even though I’m a slob but Ben’s parents can CHOOSE not to love me because there’s a dust bunny in the corner by the bar that I’ve named Stan who I water once a day and has his own college fund. But really, who DOESN’T love me. There’s so much to love. I’m cute like that.

I’m going to go scrub the baseboards with Ben’s toothbrush now.

So I guess I’m gonna have to track down Erika and shove her hair down her throat now. Ewww. I’m not even sure if I’ll watch the last episode because I really don’t care at this point who wins it. Well, maybe I will. Hopefully they’ll show DR sessions and Boogie referring to Erika as “Scrubbica is HOmance”. HA! Idiots.

Ben is driving his M3. Hallilujah, his toy is running. Two months, lots of hours and two motors later he was able to take it for a drive last Saturday. Now we just need to get him back to the track. BUT! He’s considering a cam kit before then. Which might not be bad because he’ll need to get a different flywheel meaning I’ll get his UUC and if I can stand the chatter, get a short shift kit and a clutch stop I’d be a happy happy camper.. That can shift like lightening and take corners better than YOU! Okay, that sounded kinda selfish. But still!

Cassidy is going to a movie night at Nathan’s school tomorrow to watch Herbie Fully Loaded. At first I was like, NO DATES ARE YOU CRAZY MAN GET OUT OF MY HOUSE but give me my Capri Sun and chips back first!! Then he mentioned that *swoon* Lindsey Lohan was in that and his eyes glassed over and he turned red and he got lost in outter space somewhere for about a minute and I realized that he’d probably totally ignore Cassidy the entire time. Well, that and he will be with his mom and brother and sister and 500 classmates. Har.

My birthday is in three days so you should probably get the presents in the mail now so they get here in time.

Sorry for the randomness. Sinus medicine can do that to somebody who is already somewhat mentally unstable. I like pie.

P.S. - I can’t wait to start fragging boys! *drool*

He’s willing to (virtually) pull my Dad’s finger.

From: Benjamin
To: Mike, Cherie
Cc: antigone78@gmail.com
Date: Aug 18, 2006 8:26 PM
Subject: I thought of you

Mike, one of my friends found this, and I immediately thought of you

http://www.unclephilly.com/images/pmf.swf

–
Thanks,
Ben

The best part is that he pulled the finger at least 10 times. Then, came back to it about five minutes later and pulled it some more. I’m fairly certain that if Ben ever asks to marry me, he totally has my dad’s blessing.