So a question was posed on a message board about your feelings and if you share them with your S/O and it reminded me about a conversation that Ben and I had one night over margaritas and mexican food. I don’t remember EXACTLY the situation I had explained to him but I remember telling him how I had over reacted to something he had done but rather than tell him, decided to wait to see how I felt later that day. Looking back I could see that I was acting slightly nutcase-ish but we were talking about my mood swings in general. The gun part of the conversation is real and makes me crack up even today.

Copy/pasting my forum post:

I trust Ben explicitly so he’s always who I turn to when I’m feeling like I need to talk.

I’m not always the best person to be “in tune” to what I’m actually feeling about something in the heat of the moment. I suffer REALLY bad mood swings when I’m PMSy (like bordering on PMDD) and there are times when I know that I’m probably over reacting in the “feelings” department so I usually wait an hour and reassess how I feel. Sometimes I’m like, WOW TOTALLY OVER REACTED THERE! Or if I feel like I was justified in feeling the way I did, then I can tell him and he’s always REALLY open to listening to me. There are even times I tell him about the over reacting.

Me: Hey guess what. When you were doing the dishes earlier and you put them in the dishwasher wrong even though I’ve explained it you to a BILLION times I wanted to take the turkey baster and shove it up your ass, suck out your internal organs and feed them to you for dinner. HA! ISN’T THAT FUNNY!?
Ben: *blink* *blink*
Me: But see, I THOUGHT about it and looking back I can see that I was probably being a little reactionary.
Ben: And this is why we don’t keep guns in the house.
Me: To keep me from killing you or you from killing me?
Ben: Yes.
Me: *nods*

I like that we can laugh about the fact that I’m a psychotic nutjob.

It was NOT like this in the beginning. I can’t even imagine how Ben put up with me and my walls. I was so closed off to my own feelings there was no way for me to express them to other people without completely screwing it all up and either pissing everybody off or sounding like a complete jackass. And this is not to say that I’m perfect about this now because I am SO NOT. It’s still something that I struggle with and try to work on. It’s BETTER now but I still have quite a bit of room for improvement and I’m sure that Ben can see that much more than I do because now he can read me like a book and is, in a majority of the cases, better at assessing my feelings that I am.

Yesterday I twittered how every day I’m reminded how lucky I am to have such an amazing husband and it’s true. Every single day he does something to make me love him more, trust him more, value him more… and I know I’m not always the best at reminding him of that. He asked me what I meant when I twittered and I didn’t have the words at the time to properly explain what I meant so here it is:

I’m reminded every day what an amazing man I’ve married… because he hasn’t shot me yet.

So I walk into work this morning and before I can even set my stuff on my desk The Temp says:

Temp: My computer won’t come on.

I can see her computer from where I’m standing. It has lights on the front that are CLEARLY ON.

Me: It’s on.
Temp: No it’s not look. *moves mouse*
Me: Your computer has lights on and I can hear the disk spinning from here.
Temp: Oh. Well, how come this thing isn’t on then? *points to monitor*
Me: That’s your MONITOR.
Temp: Well my keyboard or nothing is working.
Me: When you hit capslock or number lock you don’t see lights?
Temp: Hits a random button, see, nothing.
Me: Capslock.
Temp: *hits it, looks at monitor* Nothing, see?
Me: The light ON YOUR KEYBOARD is on so it’s working.
Temp: Ohhhhhhh, but this still isn’t coming on.
Me: Did you try the power button?
Temp: Which one is the power button?
Me: *officially frustrated and completely over this conversation* The circle with the line through it.
Temp: *tries power button* Nothing,
Me: You should call IT.
Temp: Can you look at it?
Me: IT will be able to troubleshoot it for you.
Temp: Okay.

Five minutes pass. She’s on hold.

Temp: I’m still on hold.
Me: Did you check the connection to make sure it’s getting power?
Temp: Oh, no. *stands up, follows the cable TO THE COMPUTER* It’s plugged in.
Me: No, I mean is it getting power from the POWER CABLE.
Temp: Oh, duh. *giggle*
Me: *head desk*
Temp: Yeah, it’s all plugged in.
Me: IT will be able to troubleshoot it for you.

Boss comes over to say good morning.

Temp: My computer won’t turn on.
Boss: It’s on, see the lights.
Temp: I mean the monitor.
Boss: …
Me: …
Boss: Will you look at it real quick? I’m late for a meeting.
Me: *get up, walk to monitor, turn it around, push power cable completely into monitor, press power button, monitor turns on*
Temp: OH WOW! THANKS! I didn’t think to check there!

REALLY!? Because when I said CHECK THE POWER CABLE I meant, CHECK THE GODDAMN POWER CABLE!

&*#$%@*%

Welcome to my Thursday.

I get pretty annoyed when a blogger presents completely skewed and misrepresented facts then closes comments because OMG somebody might not agree with them. If your opinion was solid and you honestly believed in it, then it wouldn’t be necessary to hide behind censorship and moderation.

Okay so lets start with this:

Now, if it were Obama’s daughter, we all know based on his voting record and the statements he’s made (don’t take my word for it, go look it up) that he wouldn’t want one of his daughters to be “punished with a baby” so I’m sure she would be skipping off to the abortion clinic by now. Wouldn’t want to ruin Daddy’s image. Since when did babies go from blessings to punishments?

That block of text included a video of a speech that Obama gave. If you watch the entire video it’s pretty clear that he NEVER mentions abortion. Not even ONCE. Doesn’t even IMPLY it. He states that if his daughter “makes a mistake” (SEE: has sex before marriage) that he doesn’t want her to be “punished with a baby” (SEE: if she knows about hormonal birth control, condoms, etc, her chances of getting pregnant are nil).

Lets move on to this:

Oh wait, I forgot. Babies are only blessings if you want them. Otherwise, just partially birth them, stick a knife in their neck, and rip their spinal cord out. Problem solved, right? Well if that fails, just leave them in a dumpster or something to die.

Ummm, I’m not even sure where to start with this one. Maybe go read the wikipedia article about Intact dilation and extraction because your idea of partial birth abortion is clearly WAY off base. Knife to skull: Yes. Ripped out spinal cords: No.

Let me also state clearly I AM VERY AGAINST LATE TERM PARTIAL BIRTH ABORTION. VERY.

BUT! At least when I speak about it I do so FACTUALLY. I also make sure to track down the opposing candidates rebuttal which explains his ACTUAL stance instead of just relying on what the right swinging media had to say about it.

I’m not about to sit here and say that Obama is the PERFECT candidate. He’s not. So far, none of them are. But you can’t just verbally regurgitate what the media has told you, or pick and choose the clips you want to use to prove your point, then expect that because you closed your comments down, that the truth won’t find it’s way to you. Or that there won’t be somebody from the “opposite side” that points out how wrong you are, even though you were unwilling to allow it to be addressed directly TO you. And saying that Obama would ENCOURAGE his daughter to get an abortion when your own clip to prove it NEVER even HINTS at the use of abortion, you make it pretty easy.

Just to be clear, normally I LOVE reading your blog. I know that when you get to the end of this and read that you aren’t going to believe me or won’t care but I think you have a beautiful family, two adorable little girls, an awesome little shop full of equally adorable accessories… but I don’t agree with you here and the complete misrepresentation of fact you presented drew me to respond.

And with that, I promise that’s the end of the political talk for awhile. Stay tuned tomorrow when we return to our normally scheduled vapid talk of nothing important at all.

According to this CNN article:

Palin said when running for governor in 2006 that she would support funding for abstinence-only education in schools, according to Eagle Forum Alaska, a conservative group that sent a questionnaire asking gubernatorial candidates their views on a range of issues.

Palin’s 17 year old daughter, currently a senior in highcshool, is five months pregnant. And unmarried.

FAIL.

My birthday is in 13 days (September 10th in case you want to mark your calendar). I will be 30 years old. I guess there should be some big internal FREAK THE FUCK OUT going on right now but, surprisingly, I’m pretty much okay that I’m turning into an old decrepit hag.

I’m married to a wonderful man, have a beautiful daughter, a house, two cats, three cars and very good SSRI. I’m right where I always WISHED I’d be at 30 but never really where I THOUGHT I’d be and it feels REALLY GOOD. So I think that even the impending doom of wrinkly oldness can’t bring me down from that high right now.

We’ll see though, it IS still 13 days away. A lot can change between now and then. Like, mental stability could take a momentary vacation. It’s totally been known to happen to me before.

So, I’ve decided to make a little list of the things I’d be reallystoked to get for my birthday in no particular order of importance. Well, no wait. I REALLY want number 1 and 2 but beyond that they are random in the value of wantedness.

1) Apple iPhone 3G:

I’ve wanted this since the day they announced they were coming out which also happened to be a month AFTER my mom bought me a new 1st Gen because I’d lost mine. I was finding ways to scrounge up the $200 that Apple LIED TO ME ABOUT till I found out that because I was a previous gen user, I had to wait a full year OR pay $399 for the phone. Well, my birthday is the year mark. HOWEVER, I can’t pay for it till that date and then I have to wait 2-5 weeks to actually GET IT. But whatever, as much as I want to grumble about that, there’s no way that I’ll own any other kind of phone right now because, simply, nothing else comes close to it’s general awesomeness.

And also: GPS.
And also: Loopt.
And also: *drool*

PLUS! Ben can take my 1st Gen and start using it. Then I’ll post that he’s actually TOUCHING and USING an Apple and the flesh hasn’t completely melted off his hands in disgust. And I’ll put an Apple logo somewhere on his M3. And then hide for awhile.

2) Flip Mino In black:

I know I said the Ultra before but the Mino had a rechargable battery, is smaller, only $30 more and I’m fickle like that.

As you can see by visiting YouTube, Viddler, Vimeo or flickr I’ve been uploading move video lately but my current video camera kinda sucks a lot. I love love love catching stuff in video but I want to be able to manipulate it and spend time editing and not have the end result look like a pile of warm poo, ya know. My life is too awesome and full of BADASS to not be capturing some of it more.

Actually, that was a lie, I’m just looking for a way to better utilize my hulking vanity.

3) Black & Decker 22 In. Dual Action Hedge Trimmer:

I was REALLY tempted to insist we get this when we were at Home Depot buying the lawn mower but we opted for the cheaper long blade “do it by hand” sheers instead. That was fine when I just had to do that one hedge out front but I’ve realized after three weekends of heavy use and screaming pectoralis muscles I that we should have gotten them. Because “that one hedge” turned out to be TWO, then I realized there were hedges on the other side of the driveway so now it’s FOUR. I’ve also been trimming the neighbor’s hedge because the house is on the market and nobody else is doing it so now there’s FIVE.

At first I was just thinking hedges, now, SO MUCH MORE. There has been at least 87 times I’ve thought in the last three weenends, “I really wish we had gotten those dang electric hedge trimmers!” Then I sat down and tried to think of alternate ways to clean out some of the dead undergrowth in the back yard. Napalm is at the top of the list so far and I think for the sake of ALL OF GILROY, I should go pick up that trimmer soon.

4) Garden pretties:

I have LOVED working on the yard. We are getting closer to having all the plants pretty much under control and I’d like to start adding things to make it pretty. Here are some examples:

	Looking glass hummingbird feeder
	Toad Hollow 21 In. Rumple Gnome Garden Statue
	Bird Brain Mod Pod Oval Bird Feeder
	Garden Treasures™ Polyresin Buddha Garden Statue

5) Lorem Ipsum Cuff:

I originally came across them when Chrissy Twittered it and I IMMEDIATELY fell in love with it. It’s geeky and girly and cute and either you GET it or you DON’T.

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Aliquam nec quam. Donec dolor. Suspendisse eleifend elit sit amet velit. Etiam lacus justo, lacinia suscipit, placerat id, placerat vel, odio. Vivamus eros pede, dignissim sit amet, dictum id, ullamcorper et, risus. Pellentesque ultrices justo lobortis odio. Aliquam non nulla eu ipsum consectetuer lacinia. Etiam magna purus, varius sed, varius ut, adipiscing sit amet, purus. Sed mollis suscipit est. Nunc interdum nisl ac nulla. Proin volutpat porta mauris. Fusce elit tortor, lacinia a, luctus sit amet, dignissim nec, tellus. Maecenas faucibus libero sit amet lectus. Pellentesque accumsan nulla vel eros.

6) Geeky shirts:

Like these ones from Busted Tees:

There was one more thing I wanted to add here but the site is down so if I can get there tomorrow, I’ll add it. You may now go forth and buy me things I don’t need. Or don’t, I’ll like you just the same. Plus, if you DO then I’ll, like, OWE you and I’m getting too old to be repaying favors.