Cassidy started 7th grade on Wednesday. SEVENTH. GRADE. I know, right?

On October 1st, 2003 I wrote about her first homework assignment and mentioned being “put out” by an hour of writing the letter “b” and then some cutting and glueing. I want to punch October 1st, 2003 me in the face.

I get questions about Cassidy a lot. How is she, WHERE is she, why don’t you ever write/tweet about her anymore? So: she’s fine, she’s probably in her room writing in her diary or hanging out with a friend, and becuase she’s asked me not to.

Believe me, there are VOLUMES I could write about this kid but she’s asked me not to mention things here, ALL THE THINGS I WANT TO WRITE ABOUT OF COURSE, and I have to respect that. I don’t have to LIKE it. There are so many funny stories and headdesk moments that you are all missing out on that I want to share and can’t but she’s going to be 12 in a month and we live in the digital age. Her site links to my site and kids are assholes and I don’t ever want to be the cause of any problems with that.

So instead I’ll just leave you with some of my favorite shots of her starting with when she was a sweet innocent little baby to now when I’m pretty sure there’s been a time or to she’s wished that I would spontaniously combust into a ball of flame. Have I mentioned how fun it is to embarrass a tween in public? Because it is.

This is just seconds before she took her first step. She was 13 months old and the only thing she cared about was her Pa and bubbles so that’s all it took to distract her enough to get the first step off. There was no stopping her after that!

Here she is getting the STAR Award in 1st grade. She had been wanting to get it ALL YEAR and it was the LAST MONTH. She cried when she told me she got it. I still tear up when I think about it. It was also a BIG DEAL because she got to wear whatever she wanted to school that day while the rest of the kids had to be in uniform.

This is one of my favorite pictures of her. Taken in July 2005 on my dad’s old boat and I don’t know if it’s the missing teeth, the cheesy grin or what but this is my daughter. 100%.

Here she is later the same night high on s’mores. See, this is pretty much how her face looked fer entire sixth year on earth.

And here is Halloween 2005. She was a vampire and LOVED her makeup. She told me she wanted black hair so I bought that spray and we started in on it and she HATED it all ratted like that. I thought she wanted to be a SCARY vampire. She very much wanted to be a “PRETTY vampire”. This was pre-twilight, by the way. FORESHADOW ANYBODY?

This was January 2006. I started letting her dress herself for school and do her own hair. I figured since she had to wear a uniform it couldn’t be THAT bad. I was wrong. But that was okay because it was also adorable.

Here is another one of my favorite shots of her. We had some face paint pens so played after school. It was taken in May 2006 and had suddenly grown teeth after having no front teeth for almost two years.

July, 2007. We camped out all night to get the last Harry Potter book the day it was released.

1st day of 6th grade.

Two months ago at the beach.

I could add 100 more pictures here but I’ve been working on this post for three days now and at that rate it will never get up!

7th grade.

Help me.

I am going to get around to answering the next set of questions this weekend! We’ve been a house full of sickness and whining for a week and there’s been DRAMA on top of it. I have three blog posts half written but not finished because I keep going back and forth on do I even care or want to bother… but I probably will.

One of them I have had to drastically scale back because it’s dog park drama and when I think or write about it my heart gets pumping and I have to keep deleting the work ‘fuck’ so, yeah.

Also, I am SO THE PARENT OF A TWEEN. You think a two year old is time consuming? YOU HAVE NO IDEA! Cherish those adorable chubby cheeks and sweet little silly temper tantrums because they turn into BOYFRIENDS and BOOBS.

You don’t even know.

Anyway, yes I’m alive and posts are forthcoming. For now bed is forthcoming.

Over and out.

Tonight’s questions come from the most awesome Lisa. Lisa is so full of funny and I actually get a little giddy any time I see her pop up on my twitter or facebook feed or my feedreader because I know that I’m about to giggle at her fabulous sense of humor.

Favorite feature about Ben?
Physically, his eyes. They really are a window to his mind. I can generally tell what kind of mood he’s in from across the room by his eyes. They look the best though when he’s smiling.

Non-physical would be his passion for everything he believes in. He LIVES life.

Biggest fear?
Death. I’m scared to not be here to watch Cassidy have children and grandchildren. To not see the kind of man and husband my brother becomes. To not see Ben grow more handsome as he get old and wise. It’s something I try and deal with but there are times where the fragility of life hits me and I can’t breathe and I can feel adrenaline pump into my veins as a panic attack starts but I just close my eyes, think of the HERE and NOW and remind myself to be thankful for that, and to live each day like it’s the most important one yet.

Biggest wish for Cassidy?
To know what it feels like to love somebody so much, you’d walk in front of whatever danger might exist to protect them. To know that overwhelming feeling of aww and joy as you look down for the first time at a new life you have created. To know struggle, and what it feels like to overcome, and to persevere and to LIVE. Just to experience EVERYTHING life has to offer.

Favorite healthy food?
It’s say a toss up between Ellie Krieger’s turkey meatloaf and my own homemade turkey chili. I’ll have to post that recipe soon!

Favorite unhealthy food?
Homemade: Fettuccine Alfredo with Parmesan Crusted Chicken!
Restaurant: Hamburgers! I’m a TOTAL red meat eater. Thick, and juicy and rare and smothered in blue cheese, please!
Dessert: Godiva Chocolate Soufflé from Bella Vista

I’ve decided after seeing the questions from my last post that it will probably be easier to answer them each in separate posts. You can still go ask questions here if you want and I’ll get to them all eventually.

First up is Amy who is pretty damn awesome. She’s been a huge inspiration to me in my weight loss battle. You should go check her out!

What are your tattoos of? Will you get more?
My 1st one is on my lower back and is blue daisies and a sunflower. It reminds me of my Nonnie (my dad’s mom).

The 2nd one I got because one night my dad served us entirely too much wine and somehow my step-sisters and I talked ourselves into tattoos. We each got a lotus flower in a different spot. Mine is on my ankle. My step-mom calls us the Lotus Sisters.

The 3rd one is on my wrist and is a hibiscus which is the Hawaii state flower. I got it a few days after Ben proposed to me next to a waterfall I’d just swam in in the middle of a beautiful tropical fain forest.

I REALLY REALLY REALLY want to get another one and as soon as I have the money (and the design) I will. I already know what I want and it will be something special for Cassidy.

I know that people are either totally PRO or AGAINST tattoos and I fall pretty much in the pro category. I’ve heard girls say before “Why would you try to dress up a Bentley” and other equally narcissistic bullshit and WHATEVER. Pretty much every girl I’ve heard utter those word has more in common with a used up busted Honda than a Bentley. Also, the answer is: for the same reason you put makeup on, wear perfume or keep scrapbooks. Memories and beauty. Nothing wrong with that.

Where did you meet Ben?
I met Ben streetracing. True Story. He had friends that hung out in the same circles I did and he posted on a local streetracing message board that I moderated. We had a lot in common and would hang out if the group all happened to be together. I was still married at the time and it wasn’t until a few months after Troy and I had separated that Ben started showing “interest”. We have SO MUCH in common that it was hard not to like him right back! Everybody ASSUMED I liked another guy so I think people thought I’d end up dating him. They were wrong. Ben was so nice and sweet and really sensitive to my feelings being a new single mother struggling to make it on my own. I knew within a month or two that I never wanted to be without him. <3

How did you name Cassidy? (Love her name! You don’t hear it often.) What are other names you considered?
My first Cabbage Patch doll was named Cassidy. I’ve known since then, probably around 7 or so, that my first daughter would have that name. For a week or two I considered Breann but at night when I’d dream about her, it was always Cassidy. So she became Cassidy Breann Stacy.

Do you think you’ll have more kids?
I want one more, yes. The timing just hasn’t been right for it to happen. I imaging a baby with Ben’s eyes and smile and my heart swoons.

I feel like what we need is a good old ask and answer session. So here you go, free reign. Ask me anything you want in the comments section and in a few days I’ll answer them all. We need to reconnect, I miss you all! And I feel like I’ve missed some readers along the way. Like you’ve stopped by to say hi and I’ve been too busy to see or respond so I never got the chance to go check you out.

Ask me what my favorite color is.

Ask me what I had for lunch today.

Ask me why I like chocolate so much. Actually, don’t ask me that. Some things just can’t be explained IN WORDS.

Okay, GO!