So, I color code everything. At work I have the same form but for three different tax ID’s so to make it easy to identify when I’m ALT tabbing faster than the speed of light, they all have different color bolded fonts. When people see this they immediately ask me to email them because they see how much easier it is. Then there are the people that take them and use them and then SAVE THEM to MY shared drive account with THEIR info.

LEARN HOW TO USE SAVE AS, PEOPLE. Save it to YOUR folder on the shared drive, or YOUR hard drive. But don’t change MY FORM and then save it so that when I open them all in the morning, they are all WRONG.

GAH! So I come in this morning and before I even have time to grab a cup of coffee, OH LOOK! Somebody changed my form again! I happened to have that form sitting on my desk because it was a stat request and they all have pass across my desk so I can sign them before checks can be cut.

Me: Hey, coworker. I just wanted to let you know that the CB form is available in the S drive in a CB folder so you can use that one and save it to your own S drive folder or your hard drive.
Her: Okay?
Me: Well, you used mine, and I just wanted to let you know.
Her: No I didn’t.
Me: Oh, because my form has been changed and has all of your information on it.
Her: I didn’t use it.
Me: And the information from a patient account you worked yesterday.
Her: I didn’t use your form!
Me: Okay. Well somebody used my form and submitted it and then noted the account with your name then.
Her: I didn’t use your form.
Me: I have the form in my hand with your signature on it.
Her: …

So I password protected all my forms. Even the one’s I don’t really care about because: ACCOUNTABILITY. Apparently nobody has it any more and I’m creating a weak spot on my desk from continuously pounding my head against the same spot.

Over and over.

Daily.

*Title Quote: Robert Orben

Reese started a cool meme called Macro Monday. I love love love macro photography and will take any chance I can get to put that 100mm lens onto my camera. I figured since I took this shot this weekend of Peanut I’d use him for my first submission.

This little guy is a constant ball of loving energy. He is so sweet and loves to play and cuddle and sleep under your covers. Amber and Lupe kept threatening to send him home with me and seriously, if Ben would not have COMPLETELY FREAKED OUT, I’d have totally stolen him and brought him with me. Although Amber and Lupe act tough, I know they’d be lost without him around because you can’t spend more than 2 minutes with this dog without completely falling him love with him.

Last year, like ever single year before it, I swore that this year I’d make a more solid effort to beautify the outside world by planting… things? And I’ve planted lots and lots of things over the years! And most of them have died. Because planting things I can SO DO! Really well, actually. But killing things? I totally OWN at that.

This year I figured I’d just start out slow by trying to better NOT KILL the things around my house that are already growing. Like, the rose bushes in front of the living room window that I hate so much. But just because I hate them doesn’t mean that I should just let them die, right? Well, not until I rip them out of the ground which I plan on doing as soon as I can get over my debilitating fear of The Thorns. And it doesn’t mean that I’m going to let them fall prey to the 15,326,224,889 Aphids that are EATING THEM ALIVE. I know that’s the number because Ben questioned me so I counted.

So when he asked if I wanted to ride with him to OSH the other day I went along because I had… a plan. A plan which involved 1,500 vicious, blood thirsty and highly trained ladybugs.

Unfortunately I can’t give out all the specific details of Operation Eat The Aphids Till They Are Dead because it’s a highly protected and privately funded program and the fact that you simply know the name is putting you in danger. GRAVE DANGER! As a matter of fact, I might have to kill you when you’re done reading this.

What I can tell you is that Phase One of OETATTAD has turned out a little differently then I’d expected. When checking on The Clone Army the day after they were deployed I found that Phase One, previously dubbed Search and Destroy, has turned into Find The Nearest Leaf And DO IT.

Like, you know, DO IT. IT! SEX PEOPLE, I’M TALKING ABOUT SEX HERE!

Everywhere I looked there were vicious, blood thirsty and highly trained ladybugs DOING IT. All over the yard! Fraternizing among the troops! I didn’t ask, I shouldn’t have been told! What was going on!?

So I did what comes natural to any General in time of great despair. I grabbed my camera! I wasn’t able to post all the pictures because I was kind of worried that flickr would tag me as “unsafe”. Some of these pictures are pretty graphic, people. Five sets of ladybugs DOING IT in one frame is a little much for the general public to take on. Besides I’m pretty sure I can sell those to Playbug or Bugs Gone Wild for some good money.

All I can do not is hope that Phase One: Find The Nearest Leaf And DO IT leads to Phase Two: Feast Of The Ladybug Larvae.

PS - Nine days till MAUI!!!!! (That’s how I say Maui now. In all caps with 5 exclamation points behind it. Sometimes I even vocally BOLD it.)

MAUI!!!!!

*Title quote: Robin Williams

My dad and fabulous step-mom came to visit us while my dad had some business to do locally this week. I seriously love them both and and am still laughing a little at some of the stories I got to hear while we caught up. There is never a dull moment when we get to hang out with them. It’s all laughing and funny and light hearted and “pull my finger” and horrible dirty bathroom humor.

I could go on here about how much my dad likes to tease me about talking about poop. Although I think that for every time I might have mentioned poop in casual conversations he’d point out how much I like to talk about poop TWO TIMES. So really, he talked about it at least twice as much as I did.

But! Instead I’m going to post this fantastic video that my step-mom, Cherie, and step-sister, Danielle, worked so hard on and and are, rightfully so, very proud of. I’m proud of both of them too and wanted to publicly thank them for reminding me once again how thankful I should be for all the simple pleasures I’m afforded. When I see things like this it causes me to really reevaluate my goals and “dreams” and consider just how selfish I’ve become when I think about “what’s important in life”. Because having lots of makeup and Coach purses and the latest and greatest techy toy should NOT be what I value most. And I’m not particularly sure what I SHOULD be focused on but I know that realization and reflection are the first steps and hopefully, in time, the rest will follow.

So sit, watch, listen and when you’re done go leave them some love.

*Title Quote: Helen Keller

I should apologize for the fact that I haven’t written a blog entry in, like, two weeks but I’m really not sorry. I was sick. NON FUCKING STOP. The Plague, then The Great Belly Ache of 2008, then The Sinus Headache To End Them All. And in the midst of all this Ben had the audacity to also catch The Plague and be sick and not able to take care of me in a manner in which I require while I’m clearly in need. All I ask is that he bows to my every whim and desire. He acts like this is ASKING A LOT but really, how hard is it to hand feed me chocolate ice cream while scrolling webpages for me and wiping my nose? Seriously.

Married life has been fabulous despite that one shortcoming my husband has and I have now officially acquired his last name. And can I just say that WHAT THE HELL!? Women get the shaft on that end. Social security cards, drivers license, ATM cards, bills, email addresses, online accounts, credit cards… all of them have to be contacted, forms filled out, phone calls made, then you have to call them all 29 times and yell at 17 different people to get them to understand that ALL I WANT TO DO IS CHANGE MY NAME!

Anyway! I’ve been reading all your blogs and will get around either today or tomorrow to comment and show you all much love. But I missed you all lots and lots and lots. I’d make you all cupcakes and hand them out if you were here to try and grovel but you aren’t… so I’ll just eat one in each of your honor instead!

And because I feel bad for not showing all my girls love, I command you all to go tell Brit stop being so reclusive because I miss her, poke Ashley’s belly and wish her well on her upcoming arrival, go welcome Sewwy to the inked skin family, congratulate katy on her new geek job, remind Becca that mommyhood is full of sickness and booboos and she ROCKS at it, give Steen the love and positive thoughts she needs in the wake of losing her beloved Riddle, and tell Jenn to stop blogging so much because she’s making all us slackers look bad.

There are many more of you, but I’ve reached the point at which I’ve become too lazy to continue.

*big hugs*