Normal in what sense?

So I have put off writing about this for over two weeks because as soon as you mention the most trivial TMI/personal info situation on the internet not only do you get a bunch of fun hate mail, blog posts written about you and 5,978 new links to your site.. but who wants to read about poop? If you make it to the next paragraph, I’ll assume that YOU DO. So when you try to point that snarky finger at me, I’ll just remind you of that. You totally WANTED to read about poop.

I figure that 99.9% of my family members have made it to this paragraph because if there’s one thing us Reids are good at, it’s talking about poop. I don’t think I’ve ever attended a family function where the frequency, consistency or peculiar potent nature of another’s butt bombs have NOT come up. It took me almost four hours of the first 8 hour car drive to my dad’s house to somehow work it gracefully into conversation to warn Ben before we got there.

Ben: So then I said, “Sure, I’d love some more iced tea and…”
Me: My family talks about poop!
Ben: Uhhhhh…
Me: My family. Sometimes they DO THINGS. Like fart. At the dinner table. And then somebody brings it up. Poop.
Ben: At the dinner table?
Me: Just seriously, if my dad asks you to pull his finger, don’t. Okay?
Ben: I don’t see your dad doing that.
Me: Yeah… Just, I warned you.

It took two days. Almost. While making breakfast on the second day we were there, while Ben watched my dad make his spectacular rosemary potatoes he leaned over, looked at me very seriously and said it:

Dad: Pull my finger.
Me: NO!
Dad: Too late!
Me: *looks at Ben* I’m so sorry.

So whatever. Everybody Poops. I’ve had this sinus headache for a solid week now. It started last Monday. I’m four days into a 10 day cycle of Amoxacylin (which my mom freaked out about… “CIPRO! I told you to get CIPRO!”) and I still have this problem. Every time I have a solid bowel movement, I get this EXCRUCIATING pain in my sinus cavity. Like, drop me to the floor, tears in the eyes, moaning, almost throwing up kinda pain.

WebMD was really helpful and told me that I have brain tumors. YAY! I mean, it would explain a lot. Like my obsessive compulsion to have all the cans in the pantry rowed up and facing out and organized into food groups. And why I like the color pink so much. And why think the sunflower in the front yard is stalking me.

Seriously though, I’ve never had this problem before. But I’ve never had a sinus infection before either. Is this a normal occurrence for them? I’ve not been able to turn up much on google other than the fatalistic WebMD search. I’m hoping somebody out there says that, yes you fool, it’s normal and it will go away and you’ll look back on this in a week after having received the 17th hate mail letter telling you what whack jobs your family are and laugh about your poop issue.

If nothing else, at least I’ll have an interesting story to share at the next family gathering.

go pink

Last year aflux went pink for the month of October to help promote Breast Cancer Awareness Month and I will be doing it again this year. Today I cruised on over to Steen’s and saw that she’s going to participate this year also. And you should to! So get to it, you have 10 days to come up with a cute theme and the crew over at Pink For October even have a few premade for you if you want to use them.

Its a worthy cause for our most body part! 😉

I wanted to leave you tonight with some Haiku that Cassidy wrote tonight for her homework:

Dragonflies are best friends
Dragonflies drinking nectar
Playing a happy song

and

Best friends with people
Never running away when life gets bad
Don’t always close your mind

Yes, I realize they aren’t exaclty 5,7,5 but her teacher said they had to be 5 or more, 7 or more, 5 or more. *shurg* I don’t teach the class!

And on the 11th day she came back to life.

A horrible plague has attacked my house. In the last two weeks I’ve been to the doctor twice, Cassidy once, Ben’s not had a single day where he’s not coughed, even the kitchen sink has sprung a leak!

What started for me last week as a seemingly simple sore throat and runny nose transformed into a sinus infection. I’ve never actually had a sinus infection before but at least twice in the last few days I contemplated whether I actually needed the top if my head to survive. Drilling a hole into my forehead to drain the mucus seemed like a welcome alternative to the pain I was in. Luckily, somebody finally said “sinus infection” so yesterday I went to Urgent Care and got some antibiotics and slept till 2PM today. When I woke up I could feel the stuff up there crackling and having a little going away party in my head and I was able to sit up without wincing in pain for the first time in three days.

I am so ready to be over all this, so ready to get back into the swing of things. I feel like I spent the last two weeks walking around in this haze of Vicodin (for the back pain over the birthday weekend), Tylenol and Sudafed. And I admit for the first day or two, it’s a fun haze. But after that it becomes like a cage you can’t get away from. I haven’t taken a single picture in two weeks and I have that new flash. THAT’S how sick I’ve been.

Anyway, so much has been going on in my absence from reality!

Britney bombed on the VMA’s and the world seemed shocked for some reason. OJ went all vigilante on the guy that set up all his off shore bank accounts he’s using to keep money hidden from the Goldmans. Paris was spotted in a book store. Most shockingly, Debra Messing was spotted wearing a magnificent blue parachute. In public. In the daylight. Were people could see her.

It’s refreshing to know that the people in Hollywierd weren’t too upset by my absence and continued to carry on with life as normal.

Note to self:

Next year, try not to fuck up back on birthday weekend. Or the day before your birthday. OR EVER AGAIN.

I am this close *hold finges an inch apart* from dinging 40 and getting a mount in World of Warcraft but it hurts too bad to sit at the computer. I’m on the laptop on the couch sitting the only way it doesn’t hurt.

BUT GOOD NEWS! Soembody is coming to look at the Range Rover in a few minutes and afterwards I’ll be hobbling myself into the Apple Store with Ben to pick up my second birthday gift, and 8GB iPhone. Yesterday we went to the camera store after breakfast and I got to pick up a Canon 580EX II flash and a hood for my 17/85mm lens. I got three things that I REALLY wanted so I’m a very happy camper.

Once I’m able to move again I’m going to take some photos with and without flash to show a comparison. It absolutely rocks my socks and is going to completely change what I’m going to be able to do with inside shots. Expect a bazillion pictures of the Princess and The Felines.

I hope to be back to my regular posting schedule in the next week or so. And like every other time I’ve ever said that, that means that I’m completely lying to you and you can probably expect a post about once a week. Or less. Unless Ben does something funny that has to be made fun of mentioned. 😀

29

For years Gene and I would always claim 29. No matter how old you get, when asked, say 29. I always thought WHATEVER, it’s so far away that it’ll never matter anyway!

Except now it’s 2 days away.

Around my birthday every year I wonder when I have to grow up. 18? 21? 25? Now 30? Are you officially grown up when you start wearing mom jeans and festive holiday sweaters? Because I think I’m going to be one of those crazy grandmas that has on jeans and a snakry tshirt and Chucks. What about when you drive a Cadillac 60 MPH down the slow lane of the freeway? I think we can all agree I’ll never drive slower than the speed limit. Ever.

So I dunno. For some reason this year I don’t feel older. Last month I started to wonder if I’d be here mentally right now. And by “here” I mean, not in a mental ward somewhere banging my head against a wall chanting “29, 29, 29, 29”. Then about a week ago I realized that I get to be 29 for a year.

I’ll worry about it next year.