Why is it that I find MySpace so annoying and I never post there? I’ll give you the short list:

• StupidSlowâ„¢ load times.
• Page after page of aliased flashing gifs that cause me to have seizures.
• BRIGHT YELLOW text on a LIME GREEN background that cause my eyes to bleed in pain and force me to CTRL + A just to read.
• Band Spam. If I like your music I STILL won’t add you. Just. Stop.
• StupidMenâ„¢. No, I won’t add you. No I won’t message you back. No, I won’t tell you my shoe size (WTF?!). I only add people I know in real life or that I’ve met through various message boards/blogs and like. And I don’t like many people so there’s a 98.354% chance I won’t like you either.
• Fucking embedded music players. The last thing I want while browsing the web is your crappy music blaring in the background and waking the dead man in the shed out back. It’s intrusive and ghey and insulting that you even think I’d like that music anyway. Whatever it is.
• Fucking embedded video’s. See above. Every time I visit my little brothers profile I’m assaulted by the sound of some idiot kid having a violent encounter with his keyboard. I’d like to have a violent encounter with the punk that posted it in his comments.
• MySpaceHoochiesâ„¢. They are all over the place. They’ve infected it like a nasty virus. You can’t stand to see them but you still stop and stare. Like looking at road kill. Only road kill is not as Photoshopped and a little more appealing.

It’s sad really. They basically opened a flood gate of stupidity and every moron on the planet with a digital camera and an internet connection now has a way to pollute the web. One of the girls at work was showing another her MySpace yesterday. This is the same girl I overheard asking another how to add “more pixels to her camera” and “what’s the difference between a regular pixel and a mega one”. *shudder*

It’s not that I think all these people shouldn’t be allowed on the internet. (I might actually think that a little but for the sake of my point, believe it okay?) Or that every person on MySpace is guilty of one of the above offences. I guess it’s just my way of not welcoming change. Once upon a time, having a personal spot on the web was kind of a badge of honor us geeks wore proudly. Now, with the invention of idiot proof pre designed community sites it’s just become a new fad. Like those horrid leggings all the girls are wearing now. Or blue eye shadow.

12 year olds posting crotch shots complete with ‘My Humps’ as background music and their names in pink and purple “sparkling” image next to a glowing Playboy Bunny seems to cheapen all the hard work and dedication that goes into what you get at a personal domain. What you see here at aflux or over at Amabilis. Places where the emphasis is on creative individualism and eye candy and on leaving your personal mark on something.

Or maybe I’m just freaking the fuck out because a neighbor boy left a love letter in the mailbox for Cassidy in which he calls her is girlfriend.

Who knows…

There’s a new layout. In case you hadn’t noticed. I really really really love the way it’s turned out. I downloaded a free theme from nifty.nu then spent two days tearing it apart and building it back up. I can never leave good enough alone. I need to update the site section. And still need to get around to doing anything to the about section. But it’s pretty to look at. The graphic will change too. Eventually. It’s too plain right now. But it needs to be simple and everytime I try and create something it turns out LOUD(!!). And that’s the opposite of what I want right now.

Our sunflower and poppy plants have sprouted. Cassidy is beyond excited and if the care she has been giving these little sprouts is any indication of the future parent she might be, she will raise spoiled rotten and completely smothered children. But they will be well fed and watered. Daily. At 3:00PM.

What a wonderful weekend. Wonder. Full.

Before I do anything else I need to thank Ben. For a beautiful ocean view, for an awsome massage that left me feeling weightless, for the magnificent weather Saturday, for driving the entire trip, for waking up to the sound of waves crashing on the shore, for lounging in the hot tub while the cool rain sprinkled down… The list goes on and on and on. But I’m most thankful for the thought. For romancing me. I could not have asked for more. It was perfect. Thank you.

I’m not going to go into great detail about the trip here because I kinda want to keep it magical and private. I want to remember it as ‘our time’ and ours alone. The surprise, the romance, the smile… they all haven’t worn off yet.

What I will tell you is the part when I made an ass of myself before the trip. Twice. There were probably more times but there are two particular people who must love me very much to have put up with me while Ben prepared for this.

First my mom, who love me despite my sarcastic humor. Hopefully.

Thursday night Ben picked up my phone and told me that I had missed a call from my mom and had a voice mail. But I was tired and told him I’d call her back in the morning. Then the next day he messaged me very early:

Ben: what did your mom want?
Me: I dunno.
Ben: She called me too. It might be important.
Me: I left her a message. She hasn’t called back yet.

I should have found this in itself odd. Had it been important there would have been an voice mail on BOTH of our phones that said it was important. And also, I should have realized that Ben would have told me THAT NIGHT if she had called him too. But I’m blond and gullible. heh

When she finally called me back:

Mom: I wanted to know if I could have Cassidy this weekend. I’ll be at Lincoln’s the next weekend so I wanted to spend some time with her.
Me: Oh, I see. You called because you missed HER and want to spend time with HER.
Mom: Well, I won’t be here the next weekend!
Me: But she spent the night at your house last weekend!
Mom: Well, as soon as I get back from your brothers we can go have dinner or go shopping or something.
Me: No, it’s okay. I understand how it is. She’s the granddaughter. I’m just the daughter. I understand that she trumps me on all accounts. Plus, she’s girly and you can make her wear dresses and she LIKES it and I’ll never be… that.
Mom: Anna.
Me: HA! HA! Kidding, I’ll bring her by Saturday morning.
Mom: You are not my child.
Me: I am. And you love me.

I felt bad for laying that on her even though she knew I was kidding. SHE KNEW the plan and I didn’t!! She and Cassidy ended up having a lot of fun. Nana bought her a set of gardening tools and gloves of her very own then put her to work replanting everything on her back patio. Planting is Cassidy’s new Passion of the Monthâ„¢. She’s claimed a spot in the back yard where I told her she can plant whatever she wants and spends about an hour everyday after work looking for seeds on the ground all around the house. Tonight I we’ll plant the herbs my dad and Cherie sent me and the Bougainvillea that my mommy got me for Mother’s Day. Pretty!!

The OTHER person is Jason. Who loves me despite me being a whiny ass.

Friday while at dinner at Benihana’s for Vanessa’s birthday I said to him:

Me: So, you’re coming to the autocross tomorrow right?
Jason: Well, no. I have to work on the track car.
Me: But it’s my first autocross in the M3!! Work on it on Sunday!
Jason: I have the DeAnza autocross Sunday.
Me: Come to the Marina autocross Saturday and work on the track car on sunday.
Jason: Well… *hesitates for a second* I already paid for DeAnza.
Me: Oh. *puts on pouty face*

I probably mentioned it 15 times to him before we went home. I formally give permission for Jason to give me a swift kick in the ass next time I see him. But!!! HE KNEW and about the plan and I didn’t!

Other people that knew: Ivan, Chris, Guillermo, Stuart, Marco, Jeff, Melissa… there might be more! I can’t believe all those people knew and I had NO IDEA. None. Not a single clue.

Well played, Ben. Very will played.

So yeah, the weekend was a fantastic surprise. And as if all that wasn’t enough, Ben came home and helped me clean the living room and kitchen and scrubbed our shower. And that ends the debate for good. I really do have the best boyfriend ever.

EDIT - It’s 4:00PM. I’m slightly tipsy amd waiting to start an hour long deep tissue massage. *has died and gone to heaven* /EDIT

So last night as Ben and I are getting into bed he says, “We aren’t going to the autoX tomorrow. We are going to Pismo.”

What? Pismo?!

So we are in the car on 101 just south of 46. We have reservations at ‘our hotel’ and plan on dinner at ‘our restaurant’. All just because he wanted to give me a romantic surprise…

Love. Him.

Have a good weekend everybody!!!

As Ben and I were walking through the aisle at the fabric store, I turned suddenly and heard the SideKick2 cam click from my back pocket. I was hoping that Ben didn’t hear it because knowing how much he makes fun of me for taking SO MANY PICTIRES EVERY DAY WITH THE PICTURES ALL THE TIME that he’d have fun with it for sure… But he started laughing right away and said, “You have to blog that”.

I’ve had a bit of Blogger’s Block. I’ve started at least half a dozen posts but the words don’t come out right and I start to ramble and get lost as paragraphs change direction and lead to nowhere. I’m sure it’s temporary. I really miss it, though. Feedback, creative expression, freedom. I dunno.

I hope everybody had a nice Mommy Day. We had breakfast at my favorite place with my mom then went shopping at MAC then came home and Cassidy and I planted. My dad sent me some seeds, plus I’d had some that I’d been wanting to plant, and Cassidy bought me a Gerber Daisy I wanted to get into the ground. Pretty soon the fence area in the front yard is going to be very colorful.