After coming across these while surfing the endless spance of the bloggesphere today, I decided that they were too cute not to attempt. Simple instructions. Cheap supplies. And I thought it would be cute to personalize them and send them with Christmas packages.

I’m not crafty. After spending an hour IN THE GLUE ISLE at Michaels I was already realizing that this might be one more in a long line of crafting failures. See, when people tell me these things are SO SIMPLE I think they do so with the false assumption that they are talking to somebody that can glue things together successfully. I am NOT that person.

It’s always one simple little step that throws me all off. In this case, they did not have the glue listed on the instructions. I guess Christmas is a popular season for a run on clear silicone sealer. I asked three different sales people about this and all of them looked at me like I was sent there by Satan himself to pick up the Sacred Glue of Death. One lady went so far as to tell me their daily sales numbers starting with Black Friday. Like their daily profit had something to do with me FINDING MY FUCKING GLUE.

I read every single glue packaging there. I am now a craft glue/epoxy expert. After what seemed like HOURS surrounded by women who were clearly more crafty than myself and more than willing to point that fact out, I decided on an alternative. It’s made by the Super Glue people like the stuff I was SUPPOSED to get AND it’s made for glass AND it dries clear AND it doesn’t have the toxic stoned inducing power that is rather unappropriated for a seven year old. (And I guess me too. Although I wonder sometimes if these things wouldn’t go better if I DID have the toxic high). Those, to me, seemed like the major selling points.

Did I say before that I read the WHOLE package? It doesn’t really matter. SOMEHOW I missed that the glue I got was UV reactive. Now, the geek in me thought, “UV reactive glue!!! Sweeeeeet!” The uncrafty foolish loon in me DIDN’T think, “Wow, better not attempt to make these at night and expect the glue to set!!”

Oh well, tomorrow is another day. And by day, I mean when the UV radiating sun is out.

Ben and I went to LeMans Karting for a Christmas party tonight for a local performance shop that Ben frequents. It was a blast. My average speed was 41MPH and my best lap time was only .2 seconds behind Ben’s!! Now my arms feel like putty and I’m SO tired.

I had my (hopefully) last ultrasound today. I should hear back from the doctor in the next two days regarding the gallbladder issue. I’m hoping for some encouraging news. Like they know what the hell the problem is and how to fix it.

Anyway, I’m off to bed. Need sleep. Body shutting down…

What better way is there to spend a Thursday night than decorating sugar cookies? None. And I’ll tell you why. YOU GET TO EAT THEM WHEN YOU’RE DONE!!

I have like 5 half written blog posts saved as drafts that I want to post but for some reason my creative juices have dried up. You’d THINK I’d be posting all day long at work because my boss has been out sick for two days and I’ve been trying like hell to take advantage of that and do as little work as possible. Unfortunately every time I get up from my desk I come back with two people who need to talk or piles and piles of paperwork I can’t avoid.

Survivor is on! And Cassidy is calling me to watch it so off I go. ‘Night all.

Since I was way on the other side of San Jose in the Old Hood I decided to stop by the child support agency to check in and see how the never ending saga is going. While I waited I tried as hard as I could to busy myself by chatting to Julie and Kristen and avoid having to make eye contact with any of the men. Because if you are male and are there, there’s a 99% chance you were FORCED there for not paying somebody for the child that you helped create. And rather than shoot daggers at them I just try and pretend they don’t exist… and that I’ll wake up tomorrow with the $17,000 dollars I’ve been screwed out of over the last two years.

But there was one creepy old schmuck that kept staring at me. So I gave him The Look. You know girls, the look that says “If I have to respond to you it’s going to be by shoving your balls down your throat and watching you slowly suffocate on your very own inadequacy.” He got the point and stopped.

Till after I was done with my appointment and leaving that is. While I sit and talk to the social worker I allow Cassidy to stay in the waiting room to watch movies and play with the toys. They have a Plexiglass wall so that parents can talk alone and still keep an eye on their kids. When I walked out I called Cassidy over to leave and this guys looks me directly in the face and says:

Stupid Bastard (SB): Hey, you wanna hook up sometime?
Me: *stop dead in tracks, put on paint stripping face* No.
Me: *starts to walk away*
SB: Honey, I have a masters in engineering.

Okay, he’s done it. He’s pushed me too far. If I wasn’t already frustrated about having to drive clear across town at 4:00PM I *might* have let this slide by. But that wasn’t the case and he became the best outlet for such frustration.

Me: You have a masters degree in engineering and the best line you can come up with is “Hey, wanna hook up?”
(SB): I use what works, sweetie.
Me: You know what would work? PAYING YOUR FUCKING CHILD SUPPORT so that you wouldn’t be spending your time HERE and could find a more suitable place to pick up on the mindless IDIOTS that would fall for that LAME ASS line.
SB: But.. well.. bu.. uhh…
Me: *smiles and walks out the door*

I can’t stand being leered at. Or whistled at. Or “Hey Baby-ed” by some random schmuck. When it happens I always have to fight off the urge to verbally bitch slap the guy into next week.

The only worth while part of the whole visit other than watching the old schmucks balls retract into his body was the use of words like “bench” and “warrant” followed by “has already been issued” in one breath when talking to my social worker.

I am doing this because I love Kristen.

Look at the following list and:
1) Bold what is true about you.
2) Italicize what you wish was true about you.
3) Add one true thing about you to the end of the list.
4) Tag five LJ friends!

You Have Been Tagged : I’m ending the chain. I will probably burn in hell but there are just some risks you have to take.

* I miss somebody right now.
* I don’t watch much TV these days.
* I own lots of books.
* I wear glasses or contact lenses.
* I love to play video games.
* I’ve tried marijuana. *Dad, totally I didn’t inhale.*
* I’ve watched porn movies. *An you can disown me now*
* I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
* I believe honesty is usually always the best policy.
* I curse sometimes frequently.
* I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
* I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
* I have broken someone’s bones.
* I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal.
* I hate the rain.
* I’m paranoid at times.
* I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
* I need/want money right now.
* I love sushi.
* I talk really, really fast.
* I have fresh breath in the morning.
* I have long hair.
* I have lost money in Las Vegas.
* I have at least one sibling.
* I was born in a country outside of the U.S.
* I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
* I couldn’t survive without Caller I.D.
* I like the way that I look. sometimes. on a good makeup day
* I have lied to a good friend in the last 6 months.
* I am usually pessimistic.
* I have a lot of mood swings.
* I think prostitution should be legalized.
* I slept with a roommate.
* I have a hidden talent.
* I’m always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
* I have a lot of friends.
* I am currently single.
* I have pecked someone of the same sex. i wish
* I enjoy talking on the phone.
* I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
* I love to shop and/or window shop.
* I’m obsessed with my Xanga or Livejournal.
* I don’t hate anyone. I dislike them.
* I’m a pretty good dancer.
* I’m completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
* I have a cell phone. SIDKEKICK2 4 LIFE!!
* I believe in God.
* I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
* I’ve rejected someone before.
* I currently like /love someone.
* I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
* I want to have children in the future.
* I have changed a diaper before.
* I’ve called the cops on a friend before.
* I’m not allergic to anything.
* I have a lot to learn.
* I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
* I am shy around the opposite sex.
* I’m online 24/7, even as an away message.
* I have at least 5 away messages saved.
* I have tried alcohol or drugs before.
* I have made a move on a friend’s significant other or crush in the past.
* I own the “South Park” movie.
* I have avoided assignments at work/school to be on Xanga or Livejournal.
* I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
* Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
* I have dated a close friend’s ex. *Only after getting her permission but she still hates me for it.*
* I am happy at this moment.
* I’m obsessed with guys.
* Democrat
* Conservative Republican
* I am punk rockish.
* I go for older guys/girls, not younger.
* I study for tests most of the time.
* I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met.
* I can work on a car.
* I love my job.
* I am comfortable with who I am right now.
* I have more than just my ears pierced. *My bellybutton ring still goes half way through. HA!*
* I walk barefoot wherever I can.
* I have jumped off a bridge.
* I love sea turtles.
* I spend ridiculous larger than necessary amounts of money on makeup.
* I plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
* I am proficient on a musical instrument.
* I hate office jobs.
* I love sci-fi movies.
* I went to college out of state.
* I am adopted.
* I am a pyro.
* I have thrown up from crying too much.
* I have been intentionally hurt by people that I loved.
* I fall for the worst people and have been hurt every time.
* I adore bright colors.
* I usually like covers better than originals.
* I hate chain theme restaurants like Applebees and TGIFridays.
* I can pick up things with my toes.
* I can’t whistle.
* I have ridden/owned a horse.
* I still have every journal I’ve ever written in.
* I’ve often thought that I was born in the wrong century.
* I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
* I wear a toe ring.
* I have a tattoo.
* I can’t stand at LEAST one person that I work with.
* I am a caffeine junkie.
* I am completely tree-huggy spiritual, and I’m not ashamed at all.
* If I knew I would get away with it, I would commit at least one murder.
* I cosplayed or know what cosplaying is.
* I have been to over 15 conventions.
* I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical, the better.
* I enjoy a nice glass of wine with dinner.
* I’m an artist.
* I am ambidexterous.
* I sleep with so many stuffed animals, I can hardly fit on my bed.
* If it weren’t for having to see other people naked, I’d live in a nudist colony.
* I have terrible teeth.
* I hate my toes.
* I did this Meme even though I wasn’t tagged by the person who took it before me.
* I have more friends on the internet than in real life.
* I have lived in either three different states or countries.
* I am extremely flexible.
* I love hugs more than kisses.
* I want to own my own business.
* I smoke.
* I spend way too much time on the computer than on anything else.
* Nobody has ever said I’m normal.
* Sad movies, games, fics and the like can cause a trickle of tear every now and then.
* I am proficient in the use of many types firearms and combat weapons.
* I like the way women look in stylized men’s suits.
* I don’t like it when people are unpleased or seem unpleased with me.
* I have been described as a dreamer or likely to have my head up in the clouds.
* I have played strip poker with someone else before.
* I have had emotional problems for which I have sought professional help.
* I believe in ghosts and the paranormal.
* I can’t stand being alone.
* I have at least one obsession at any given time.
* I weigh myself, pee/poo, and then weigh myself again.
* I consistently spend way too much money on obsessions-of-the-moment.
* I’m a judgmental asshole.
* I’m a HUGE drama-queen.
* I have traveled on more than one continent.
* I sometimes wish my father would just disappear.
* I need people to tell me I’m good at something in order to feel that I am.
* I am
* I could speak more than one language.
* I can fall asleep even if the whole room is as noisy as it can be.
* I would rather read than watch TV.
* I like reading fact more than fiction.
* I have pulled an all-nighter on an assignment I was given a month to do.
* I have no piercings.
* I have spent the night in a train station or other public place.
* I have been so upset over my physical gender that I cried.
* I once spent Christmas completely alone because there was a miscommunication on which parent was supposed to have me that night.
* I’ve been married and am now divorced.
* There have been times when I have wondered “Why was I born?” and may/may not have cried over it.
* I like most animals better than most people.
* I own a collection of retro games consoles.
* I procrastinate more than anyone I know.
* I am a survival-horror addict.
* I plan on moving atleast 100 miles away from my current home in the next year.
* I love singing Broadway
* I have so many pets that when I tell people how many I have, they are stunned.
* I would love to meet some of my Xanga or LiveJournal friends in person
* I love wearing high heels
* I think the people that have written some of the above lines either don’t speak english or posess all the intelligence of a groundhog. A retarded groundhog.
* I believe chocolate cures EVERYTHING.