Pismo Beach Weekend

On Black Friday Ben snagged a few nights at our favorite hotel in Pismo, SeaVenture, and we were finally able to use them up last weekend and it was PERFECT. We woke up both mornings to the sound of rain and waves but still had two days of beautiful blue skies. It was so very relaxing. Walks on the beach and to eat and to get coffee. Lots of soaking in the hot tub on the balcony. Lots of laying in bed talking and laughing and watching bad TV.

And we ate a lot of food.

A. LOT.

029/366 Selfie on the balcony of our room. ??

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Crispy calamari bahn mi. Delicious!

Trying to get that perfect sunset shot. ;)

Pismo Weekend

Pismo Weekend

Pismo Weekend

Pismo Weekend

Ahi tuna wraps! #YES

Time for some dinner #NOMS!

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To offset that cinnamon roll breakfast. ;) Black bean quinoa sliders and tomato soup. #Vegan deliciousness!

I think there's a dire wolf loose in Pismo.

Sugar rush incoming!

Coconut shrimp.

Halibut fish and chips OMG SO GOOD.

Ben's scallops and risotto.

My magical purple Tignanello purse.

My mom got me this magical purple Tignanello purse for Christmas and it’s just so awesome that I HAD to share it because, seriously, you NEED THIS PURSE IN YOUR LIFE. I liked it when I first saw it but once I realized it is a magic T.A.R.D.I.S. purse that you can fit your entire life into I absolutely fell in love with it. Look how tiny and cute it looks on the outside when it’s all closed up. That’s an iPhone 6 Plus if you are looking for a size comparison.

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This little tag is actually a mirror. Adorable!

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The best part of this purse is that it unzips all the way to the base of the purse so although you can stuff it full of things, it makes it very easy to get to any of your stuff once it’s opened. And seriously, LOOK AT ALL THAT STUFF! And I still have lots of little pockets to fill!

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For a better look at the contents I pulled it all out and laid it in front of the purse.

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Here is an even better view of all the things opened and pulles out of their containers. Yes, I carry all this around with me every day because: LIFE.

From left to right:

  • Pink case with my Dior prescription sunglasses
  • Blue Case with my regular Brighton sunglasses
  • Ipsy case with pens, highlighters, tabs and whatever washi tape I’m using for my current week in my Bullet Journal
  • Selfie Stick (shut up)
  • Makeup: Michael Kors perfume/lipgloss pen, Cover Girl lipstain, hand cream, a matt lipstick from Ipsy, jellybean case full of pills and my contact case.
  • iPhone 6 Plus
  • Michael Kors wristlet and matching card case with my car key attached. I keep all my cards and cash/change in this so that if I just want a small purse I can grab it and leave quickly.
  • Bullet Journal which is a Leuchtturm 1917 in Berry and I LOVE it.
  • Hairbands. For that thick hair life.
  • The rest of my house/work keys.
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Normally I also have my portable phone charger and cable in there too but it’s currently on my desk at work charging. OOPS! Left it there over the weekend.

AND THERE IS STLL ROOM.

There are a ton of places you can buy Tignanello purses like Macy’s and Nordstrom but they are REALLY affordable on QVC which is, I’m sure, where my mother got mine.

Mandatory Disclaimer: I was in no way compensated for this post. This purse was purchased for me by my awesome mom, I was not asked to review this product, the manufacturer of the product does not even know I exist. I just REALLY like this purse.

Amazon Wars

Ben via chat: Just ordered this
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Me: Plugs? Are they for the butt?
Ben: No. They are for the car.
Me: hehehe I KNOW! I’m so funny.
Ben: …

A few hours later.

Me: I just ordered this.
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Ben: $850,000!?
Me: Right!?
Ben: What even is this?
Me: It’s a poster! An $850,000 poster. But free shipping!
Ben: I’m so confused.

Mission accomplished.

Goodbye, Friend.

I miss her. I miss her on my pillow at night. I miss our daily cuddles when I get home from work. I miss flopping down onto my bed and her protesting from under the covers because I didn’t notice her there. I even miss her reminding Kumo every night that she was the boss of him.

I just miss her. But missing her means that for a long time she was here and I got to love her. And that love is so very much worth the pain I feel now. I know that it will pass and in the end I’ll just be left with a life time of awesome memories of how much she loved me but hated every other living thing on Earth.

The earliest photo I have tagged of her on Flickr. Taken January 26th, 2004.

Slumber Party

Checking out the backyard of our house in San Jose. She never really liked to go outside and would only go out if you were out there with her and she would always try and position herself between you and the door. So if you moved like you were going inside she could be sure and dart in before you and never be left out alone.

About to eat me.

This is the day we brought Hans home. This photo sums up pretty well how she felt about it.

So.  Pissed.  Off.

I probably moved a muscle causing her to think I was about to go inside and abandon her outside alone forever and ever.

KC and Hans.

Reminding Hans that she is the boss of him.

Round 2: KC

“I am going to hug you to death.”

KC tries to kill Hans.

“Happy Fucking Halloween.”

Sleep with one eye open.

She always found my clean clothes to be the most comfortable spot to clean her butt.

Me: GET OFF MY CLEAN CLOTHES! KC: What? Sorry, I couldn't hear you over the sound of my tongue licking my butt.

Her amazing eyes and that tiny pink spot on my nose were always my favorite things about her.

KC

And, or course, my most favorite photo of her I ever took.

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Goodbye, friend. You left a really big paw print on my heart and I will cherish your memory forever. <3

But it will get better. It will.

I’m in a dark place. For the last two weeks I’ve been spending every bit of energy I have to pretend that I’m okay. I am not.

If you know me and you’ve seen me you probably think I’m great. At work I’m really good at pretending that I’m perfect. Around friends I’m really good at putting on the happy face. Online I post happy status updates and smiling photos. It’s a lie. Every single second of every single day I am fighting back the need to lay in a dark room and cry.

It’s exhausting. I am exhausted.

I am trying very hard to hold on to my Furiously Happy. Happy memories and the people near me who love me are what are keeping me afloat right now. Without the support I’ve been getting from online friends, kind words of understanding support from real life friends and, most importantly, Ben’s constant understanding, support and love, I would be lost.

It sucks. It sucks so bad. But I know that it’s temporary. I know that this will pass. The scary part is that because of the situation, I know it’s going to get more painful and more sad and more exhausting before it gets better.

But it will get better.

It will.

“Without the dark there isn’t light. Without the pain there is no relief. And I remind myself that I’m lucky to be able to feel such great sorrow, and also such great happiness. I can grab on to each moment of joy and live in those moments because I have seen the bright contrast from dark to light and back again. I am privileged to be able to recognize that the sound of laughter is a blessing and a song, and to realize that the bright hours spent with my family and friends are extraordinary treasures to be saved, because those same moments are a medicine, a balm. Those moments are a promise that life is worth fighting for, and that promise is what pulls me through when depression distorts reality and tries to convince me otherwise.”
Jenny Lawson, Furiously Happy: A Funny Book About Horrible Things

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